Sunday, January 31, 2010

Poetic Hydraulics

It’s been an interesting week. Finally broke through my second plateau and dropped my tenth pound in what is now day 39. I’m still on my quarter pound a day track (sounds like a McDonald’s commercial, doesn’t it?). Actually lost the tenth pound two days ago but my wife was indisposed (bladder problems) so no date that night, and I was on a business trip for two days and just returned. Didn’t gain anything on the business trip, but didn’t lose any weight either. Hopefully, tonight is a date night - but you never know.
I have been wearing the CB-6000 on a regular basis. As mentioned in a previous post, I wear the regular tube at night with the largest ring and spacer; and the shorty tube during the day with the medium ring and second largest spacer. It’s been pretty close to 24/7, just taking it off to shower while changing the equipment from night gear to day gear. It’s been very comfortable - no rashes or abrasions as others have described. I use a thick, water based lubricant, Maxx, on the shaft and head and the front of the scrotum where the tube presses (particularly the shorty tube), and use a skin cream moisturizer around the entire circumference of my genitals after shaving (I keep about three quarters of an inch clean shaven all the way around). It seems to be working.
The night time erections are kind of interesting - “full bladder woodies,” I’d call them; the entire penis gets fiercely hard and tries its best to erect, succeeding at least partially. The head presses so hard against the end of the tube that part of it protrudes through the slit. Meanwhile, the erecting penis pushes the tube outward from the body with all of the force that my blood pressure can muster. As the tube is attached to the ring around my shaft and balls, it pulls the whole package out from my body, applying considerable pressure to my balls. It is this pressure that often wakes me up at about 4 A.M..
I usually try to mentally defuse the erection, thinking of something non-sexual, multiplication tables, the latest basketball scores, anything. It doesn’t work. Although I can almost always defuse an erection when stimulated by sexual thoughts or stimuli, the full bladder woodie seems to have a life of its own - more hard wired physically and not subject to mental manipulation. Even though I’m wearing the largest ring, which is two sizes larger than the one that fits me during the day, it is absolutely filled without room for even the tip of my pinkie to fit. Not only is my scrotum filling the ring, my balls trapped and fixed in place between the ring and tube plate, but the part of my shaft buried under the skin at the perineum is also fully engorged and pressing against the inside of the ring.
The engineer part of me marvels at the hydraulics at work and the way the CB-6000 is designed to harness that hydraulic power to discourage it. The design takes the pressure of an erection and applies it against the tender testicles trapped between two unyielding plastic plates. The poet part of me enjoys the irony that the power behind those hydraulics is my beating heart. It is my own heart that is pressuring my tender balls, holding them hostage until I get up and relieve my poor bladder.
Can’t wait for tonight’s date - if it happens. I’ll write about it in my next post.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Getting Shorty

Jan. 22, 2010: It has been 30 days since I started this chastity routine. In my last post, I described the amazing sex I had with my wife four days ago. It was truly mind-shattering, for both of us. I feel like I've stumbled upon some kind of source of power and pleasure that I'd never even imagined before. My wife, who is as vanilla as they come, is starting to think about the possibilities of this. In addition to the fabulous sex, it is also affecting the rest of our relationship in a positive way. The last couple of weeks I found myself wanting to do things for her -meal preparation, shopping, laundry, anything to make her life easier. I also find myself wanting to be with her, in the same room, on the couch together. I also want to be touching her and do so at every opportunity, not in an overtly sexual way, but softly caressing her arms, massaging her shoulders, touching her face. And she has been responding to this new found attentiveness on my part with touches and caresses for me.
On the diet front, I have lost a pound since our last sexual encounter, but alas we are having guests stay for the weekend and my wife is not comfortable having sex with guests in the house. I've always said that we could have sex without anybody in the house hearing us. However, given how loudly vocal we were last time as we both gave voice to the most intense and long lasting pleaurable feelings either of us has had before, I have to conclude that this time she is right. The funny thing is - after experiencing that kind of sex after abstinence, I don't mind waiting, delaying, abstaining for a few days. I now know what's waiting for me at the end of the delay. On the total weight loss, after 30 days, I've lost 7.6 lbs, a rate that almost exactly matches the quarter pound per day I projected at the start of this.
As for the title of this post - "Getting Shorty," it refers to my purchase of a CB-6000s or "shorty" cage to complement the regular CB-6000 I've been using. After testing the regular CB-6000 for a couple of weeks, it became clear to me that although the device was comfortable and not readily detectable when I had on baggy jeans and an oversized, pull-over shirt, it was less comfortable in dress slacks or suit pants and it was definitely visible. Although some chastity bloggers have said "so what, so it bulges a little", I can't do that. My private life is my own - it is not for public display.
I had read some reviews of the CB-6000 "shorty" and was a little doubtful that I could fit into it. I generally measure about 31/2 to 4 inches when flaccid and the "shorty" description says it's 21/2 inches long. But I did notice that after wearing the regular CB-6000 for an hour or so, I seemed to shrink quite a bit. I guess my ancestors must have derived some evolutionary benefit from shrinking their dick when it was caught in a tight place because I seemed to have inherited the trait. When I measured myself after one of those "shrinkages," I found that I was less than 2 inches in length. So I ordered the shorty cage and gave it a try.
It arrived last week, and as I suspected, I could not put it directly on, I was too big. But after wearing the regular 6000 for an hour or so, I'd shrunk enough to allow me to swap out the shorty for the regular cage. It slipped on easily; easier than the regular cage when first putting it on.
The shorty has a much smaller profile, both because of its shorter length and its steeper downward angle. The regular cage points downward at an angle. The shorty points almost directly down, laying snuggly against the front-center of the ball sack. It is very comfortable with all types of slacks and has no visible bulge. From the outside, it feels like a small, athletic, protective cup. The only drawbacks with it I found are the steeper angle puts a little more pressure on the tendons that hold the penis to the pelvic wall - not painful, but definitely there; and it is much less forgiving of erections, or should I say attempted erections.
For me, attempting to erect in a shorty is both a futile and moderately painful activity. Futile in that the shorter length and steep downward angle make an erection impossible for me (unlike the regular 6000, where I can actually erect somewhat, although not fully.) and moderately painful as just the start of an erection immediately pulls on the encompassing ring, putting pressure on my balls which are trapped snuggly between the ring and cage, and separated by the underside of the cage. It feels like a hand closing around the ball sack and pulling on them like a weighted parachute harness. Fortunately, I did not naturally start to erect while in the shorty; in fact it kept my dick well insulated from stimulation. I tested what would happen with an erection by watching some porn. If you are looking for an anti-erection as well as an anti-orgasm device, then the shorty is for you.
Over the last two days, I have been testing a sort of rotation - using the regular CB-6000 at night (with a larger ring, pin and spacer than I normally use) and then switching to the regular sized ring, pin and spacer in the morning for an hour or so (to shrink me enough) before putting on the shorty cage with the regular ring/pin/spacer for the remainder of the day. It has worked very well. I have slept normally with it at night and gone about my normal, daily routine with the shorty on during the day.
So far, my wife has not detected the chastity device. If she does, I will tell her it's to help me to stay chaste both to motivate me for weight loss and to continue the great sex we are having. After another 30 days, I shuld be down to my goal weight. We will then talk about how we keep this great thing going, without weight loss as a prime motivation. I think that would be a good time to tell her about the chastity devices and how much they helped me during the diet and how I would like to continue using them afterwards. Til next time . . .

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Cruel and Unusual Punishment

Okay - now this was cruel and unusual punishment. I woke up early Sunday morning, weighed in and found my weight loss to be still two tenths of a pound short. I had lost only eight tenths of a pound instead of the required full pound since my last sex/release. It was now seven days, which is like an eternity for me who has been used to one or more releases every day.
I get a call an hour later from a buddy of mine who tells me he has a Chargers playoff ticket available to sell from the friend he attends games with who hurt his back. I jump on it and an hour and half later, I'm in the stadium parking lot with my buddy at a terrific tailgate party. A large grill is cooking bratwursts, sausages and dogs, and the tables are groaning with chips, dips, cookies and brownies and there are jugs of pre-mixed margueritas. And me, I'm dieting and two tenths of pound short of my goal to get relief. I know if I partake of the spread, It will be at least another week (or more!) before I've lost that damned pound.
This is where the power of chastity comes in. In previous diets, I would have partaken of the fare, mentally checking it off as a one day, off-diet day and promising myself to go back on it tomorrow. Not this time though. I wanted that sexual relief bad - my penis was in an almost constant state of arousal; it was fairly vibrating with excitement. I stayed on the diet. I passed up all the great food and munched on carrots and celery, and drank my unsweetened ice tea. Then I went in for the game; watched the Chargers fumble and stumble around for three hours and lose miserably to the Jets. Then, to allow the traffic to lighten, they set up the tailgate food again and for another hour and a half I sat and willed myself to pass on the spread, my tingling groin reminding me why.
The next morning, Monday, I weighed in and found I had lost those troublesome two tenths of a pound. It had taken me eight days, but I had finally lost the damned pound. I told my wife the news and she told me that I was doing great and tonight would be a "date" night. Yahoo - at last. I felt like a teenager getting ready to go parking on lover's lane with a high school hottie.
The day couldn't pass fast enough. Finally, evening came. She asked me to make her a drink while she showered. My wife is very fastidious about her hygiene, particularly for sex. She will shower, freshly shave her legs, buff nails, shampoo hair, powder and lotion her body, mouthwash and brush, etc. and she expects the same of me which I always do. Of course, unfortunately, this makes spontaneous sex just about impossible. All of our intimate encounters are scheduled "dates." In twenty years we have had perhaps a half-dozen "spur of the moment" flings and then only after she had had a lot to drink.
We watch a little TV together while we sip our drinks and cuddle a little - talk about how the day went. I gently stroke and massage her legs as we talk; she has on a short nightie shirt and a robe as we sit and talk. I think she senses that something is different tonight. She knows we haven't had sex in a while and it's tied to my diet but doesn't know that I have been using a chastity device, and doesn't know just how unusual it is for me to go that long without an orgasm.
The show ends and we head for the bedroom, hand in hand. I feel like I'm nineteen again, all aquiver with sexual excitement. I put some soft music on, strip and get into bed. My wife finishes primping a bit before removing her robe and turning off the light. My wife prefers sex in the dark which is really too bad because she has a beautiful body and I love looking at it. We've had sex in the daylight before, with shades tightly drawn to darken the room. But at night, the lights go out.
A little foreplay starts, her hands rubbing and massaging my thighs before working their way up to my groin; my hands mirroring hers until I find the neatly trimmed furrow of her pubic mound. As usual, she has already put lubricant in her pussy. She says she does this because in her stage of life (menopausal) she is drier than she used to be and must have a genrous amount of lube to be comfortable. I'm sure this is all true but I think she puts it on beforehand, instead of during foreplay to discourage oral sex. She is just too fastidious and self-conscious about her hygiene to be comfortable with oral sex. I've told her many times that I love what little musky aroma is present but no dice. The lube we use is silicon based and is absolutely awful to taste. The discouragement plan works.
I think she notices right away that I am more sensitive, more aroused than usual and she starts to delight in teasing me - stroking my cock and balls lightly before pulling her hand away. Meanwhile, in between sharp spasms of pleasure reacting to her touch, I am gently stroking her pussy, working my fingers up and down the slit, dipping in occasionally and then finding her clit and working my fingertips in gentle circles around it. She is responding to my increased passion with more passion of her own.
After about twenty minutes of this, with fingers in her pussy and my mouth on her nipples and the nape of her neck (her favorite spot), she climbs on top of me and starts teasing me again, drawing my rampant cock up and down across her clit and the lips of her pussy, both of us moaning loudly. I could cum at any time, but my many years of self-exploration have given me the ability to stop just short of orgasmic explosion and stay at that heighened arousal almost indefinitely.
Finally, she puts me in her and she begins riding me, drawing herself up and down instead of in and out, maximizing the pressure and friction on her clit. I match her movements, stroke for stroke, and we are in perfect harmony. I have never felt such intense pleasure without an orgasm before. It's like electricity, coursing through my shaft, then deep into my groin before hitting my spine and radiating upwards and outwards in all directions. We go on like this for what must have been ten minutes of so before she begins panting loudly, faster and faster; her hips jerking spasmodically.
I know that this is what she does just before she cums and I'm a little surprised but so turned on by it I can't even describe the feeling. Surprised, because my wife almost never orgasms from penetration and intercourse - her orgasms almost always come after I've cum (at her insistence) with a vibrator and the help of my fingers. I say amost never, because I can't even remember the last time she orgasmed while I was fucking her. I dimly recall her doing it a couple of times before we got married but who knows if those were real. This one was definitely real.
She goes off like a rocket, wildly jerking her hips as I grasp her breasts with my hands and massage her nipples with my finger tips. She's screaming and hissing in my ear, then crushing her lips to mine, her tongue halfway down my throat as she continues to spasm and jerk before finally collapsing on top of me. I keep up the strokes but slow them down; her "dryness" problem obviously a thing of the past as I slip and slide easily in and out of her. After a few minutes, she catches her breath and raises her slim torso back up and again and picks up the riding pace just about where she left off when she came.
I wanted to give her another orgasm. I wanted us to come together, so I reached back to the nighstand and picked up the Hitachi wand type vibrator, putting it on low and slipping in between our sweaty pubic mounds until I found the top of her slit. She jumped when it made contact, her clit still obviously very sensitive from her last orgasm. I moved it off to the side and let it vibrate in circles along her sensitive inner thighs; then moving it in large circles around her thighs and lower abdomen, avoiding her crotch, inching closer with a tease and then moving it away.
After several minutes of this, she reached around and started playing with my balls - a sure fire way to get me off. With knowing fingers, she found that sensitive patch under my balls, the perineum, and began massaging it. I thrust up violently in reaction, waves of pure pleasure bursting within me. She began laughing, teasing me with her fingers as I began thrusting rapidly in and out. I had just enough presence of mind to move the vibrator closer to her clit. My wife didn't wait for me to make contact, she guided my hand with the vibrator and then took it from me, finding her joy spot herself immediately. She bucked quickly once, twice, then several times rapidly as she began pantly loudly again, moaning in pleasure.
I knew the time was right and I let myself go, mentally picturing the head of my dick entering her tunnel through her swollen, shining pussy lips and then exploding in a shower of white jets. Just as I formed the image in my head, that last little tumble fell into place and I felt that exquisite last moment of burning, intense, indescribable pleasure before I erupted, bucking wildly. As soon as I violently, and compeltely impaled her, I felt her shudder and shake and then scream that she was cumming. Together, we bucked wildly, comletely lost in the waves of pleasure that kept washing over us. Finally she stopped and collaped on top of me. I was still stroking back and forth, slowly, squeezing every last drop of pleasure out of the orgasm.
We lay together, her on top of me, our sweat mingling, making her slippery on top of me, both of us gone, not unconscious, but not really conscious either. As we both stirred and recovered, she whispered in my ear - "I don't know what this diet and chastity thing is all about but whatever you're doing, keep it up. That was the best sex I've ever had." "Me too," I replied. "I can't even describe what I felt - it was so intense and it lasted so long."
In another a minute or so, she was up and takng a shower while I put the lube and vibrator away. It was, without a doubt, the best sex I've ever had. This chastity diet thing is like flipping a two headed coin. "Heads I win," if I make the pound lose quickly, in three or four days - then there is sex that night. "Heads I win," if I don't quite make the pound for some time - if I plateau like I did this time and it takes eight days, I get incredibly pleasurable sex and a thoroughly turned on wife. Either way, it's all good for me. And, apparently, for my wife too. I think this lovemaking session will make her more receptive to the parts of this program I've kept secret from her - the chastity device and the elimination of my masturbation habit. Maybe she won't think I'm some kinky nutcase after all. I think she's just glimpsed what's in it for her and it was a powerful vision indeed.
The next morning when we both remarked on how wonderful the previous night had been, she said that one of the things that really turned her on was the feeling of power over me - that she could give or withhold immense plesure at her whim. Indeed, indeed she could. Til the next post . . .

Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Latest Adventures of Secret Chastity Husband

I have good news and bad news. The good news is I had sex with my wife six days ago and it was absolutely fabulous. I can't even describe the body-jerking, toe curling, spine tingling (literally!) orgasm I experienced. I have had five orgasms since I started this program 24 days ago, and the sex has gotten progressively better. My wife's orgasms have also improved as she is turned on by my passion and explosions. Before this, I usually had sex with my wife about twice a week, but I oragasmed at least once a day from masturbation. Maybe it's the physical build-up of semen, maybe it's the heightened anticipation - the edginess of going without, maybe it's knowing that my wife feels empowered by this (she told me this last week - it's a real turn on for her that I must battle every day with my horniness for her), maybe it's all those things, maybe it's something else entirely, but after almost twenty years of increasingly mundane, routine sex with my wife, it is now an earth-shattering experience that I eagerly seek and will do what I need to do to obtain it (i.e. hold to my diet and lose the pound needed).
Now the bad news, it had been six days since I last had sex with my wife and my weight has plateaued - I've lost only 0.6 lbs in those six days as it has see-sawed back and forth between no loss and the 0.6. Fortunately, I've had experience with diets before and know the body hits a "set point" after it's lost 4-5 lbs. and tries to hold onto the weight (remember homeostatis from high school biology), retaining water even as it burns fat to maintain overall body weight. Basically, it's trying to wait out (pardon the pun) the famine. The only thing that works is to stick to the diet and actually increase the protein levels of the diet to 40-50% from 30-40%. I've also pushed up my exercise intensity a little the last couple of days. In the past, my body gives up after a few days and suddenly drops a couple of lbs. over night (with lots of getting up to pee during the night). Hopefully, tonight will be that night.
I've been wearing the CB-6000 for at least several hours each day throughout the week - the first week of wearing it a lot each day. I can report amazingly few difficulties. I went out with it and did a couple of hours of routine errands while wearing it - grocery store, cleaners, gas station, Starbucks, hardware store, etc., and often I forgot I had it on. I was wearing baggy jeans, loose boxer shorts and an oversized tee-shirt so I was pretty confident that no bulge was visible. The only difficulty, and it was minor, was getting in and out of my car. Somehow, lifting my leg like that to climb in and out would put pressure on my balls which are trapped and held fast between the hard plastic of the ring and the cage base.
The other thing that took a while getting used to was having my dick pointing almost straight down; the natural position I carry it is ususally pointing out or slightly up and to the right (a right-hanger as a tailor would call it). It felt oddly out of place pointed down like that - it is psychologically, a very submissive position for it, at least to me and that gave me pleasure. I also derived considerable psychlogical pleasure from walking around, doing routine errands and having a secret under my pants that would certainly surprise and shock nearly everybody I met. I wondered what the young Starbucks gal taking my coffee order would think if she knew what I had hidden from her by the thin material of my pants.
One of the days I had it on for the afternoon, working at home, planning to take it off in a few minutes before my wife came home (she still does not know that I'm using a chastity device - please read my earlier posts for why), when I heard the click of the front door latch. She came home almost an hour early, completely surprising me. At first I panicked, but then realized that I was in the same baggy jeans and shorts and long t-shirt I wore when I went on my errands. Unless she touched me in the crotch, or pressed up against it with her body, she would never know I had it on. I was smiling inside as she came up and gave me the usual peck on the lips greeting me as I slipped my hand down between us to keep her from feeling the hard bulge of plastic in my crotch. She never suspected a thing and went off to shower and change for dinner. I continued to wear it for a couple of more hours, eating dinner with her, only taking it off before settling down on the couch to watch TV, since she sometimes curls up next to me and would surely feel it.
She went to bed about an hour earlier than me which is common on "non-date" nights. I decided to wear the CB-6000 that night for the first time. I thought there was minimal chance my wife woud feel it, she sleeps all the way on the far edge of our king-sized bed and likes her own space when she's sleeping. No spooning or cuddling for her; she is like Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing - "This is my dance space, this is your dance space. You don't come into my space and I don't come into yours." She is very territorial when in bed if it's not a "date" night.
From what I read, I expected the device to be uncomfortable and that I would have difficulty sleeping. It wasn't uncomfortable at all - in fact I tried a number of different positions to see which ones would be uncomfortable and found only belly- down to be problematic - the downward pressure the cage puts on the shaft is increased in the belly-down position causing some discomfort from the pressure this puts on the tendons holding the shaft to the pubic area. Kind of like having your erection pushed down like the handle of a pump - not good. I think I helped the comfort of the device by using the largest ring (I normally use the middle ring) and the largest locking pin and spacer (I normally use the second largest). I got up several times during the night to pee and only had a problem once. In the dark, I could not see that I was half-erected (as erect as I could be in the cage) and my uretral opening was partially blocked making it difficult to pee and difficult to empty my bladder completely. In the dark, I thought I was done and stood up only to realize with my first step that standing up had freed the blocked urethral opening and more urine streamed out. I slipped on the small puddle with my first step and almost took a header. I caught myself and quickly cleaned up the mess. My wife is a heavy sleeper and never stirred. Lesson learned - pee with the light on. The folllwing morning, I rose first, removed the device and stored it away. She never suspected a thing.
On my next post I will write more about my wife's sexual habits, at least her preparations as it relates to why I can probably keep this thing secret indefinitely unless i am really careless or unlucky. Until next time . . .

Monday, January 11, 2010

The Diet Part of Chastity Diet - How I'm Doing

Okay - time to write about the "Diet" part of The Chastity Diet. First, a few facts and some history. I am six feet tall and in my mid-fifties. I started the diet at 184 lbs (183.8 - my scale reads in tenths, which ususally isn't that important but is now). I currently weigh 178.8 lbs, which means I've lost five pounds in 19 days. This is a rate of slightly better than a quarter pound a day or a pound every four days. This rate is right for me - it matches the rate at which I've successfully lost weight before.
Since the rule is "no sex until I've lost a pound from the weight I was when I last had sex," this doesn't sound too bad - sex every four days - but alas my body does not lose weight in a linear fashion. It will hang onto weight for some time before it finally gives up and releases it. The first pound took a week, my weight hovering between a half pound gained (!) and a half lost for the first six days, and then registering an overall two pound loss on the seventh. To encourage me, my wife actually went two rounds with me in celebration: an afternoon romp and a cozy next morning wake-up fuck. We were staying in a hotel for New Year's Eve, so that definitely added heat to the atmosphere - my wife is always more interested and passionate about sex in a hotel.
I guess a little weight loss and maintenance history about me is in order. Most of my young adult life, my weight hovered around 200 lbs.. I loved to eat; had an enormous appetite and generally didn't give a moment's thought to "healthy eating." About 22 years ago, my weight started to creep up, slowly at first and then at an increasing rate. It was a very stressful time in my life and my physical activity had been reduced to almost nothing. I was also smoking heavily. By my mid 30's my weight had balooned to 235 lbs, I was smoking 3+ packs a day and drinking a half-gallon of coffee a day as well. I couldn't walk up a flight of stairs without breathing heavily. I felt sick and exhausted all the time. After seeing some particularly unflattering photos of myself - finally seeing myself as others saw me, and knowing that I was on schedule for an early heart attack, I finally did something about it. I put myself on a strict 1500 calorie a day diet and began swimming to get my body moving a little. About 2 weeks into the diet, I quit smoking as well. I made it a test of wills - who was in charge, me or the food and cigarettes.
Well, it took 10 months, but I reached my goal of 165 lbs.. I had lost 70 pounds! I beat the nicotine habit and could swim a mile without breathing heavily. I was very proud of myself and began dating regularly again. I met my wife several months later and was immediately smitten. She was and is a tall, slim blonde with beautiful proportions. We were married a year later.
Sounds wonderful and it was. But there were two problems: First, I had no clue as to how I would maintain the weight loss. I still loved to eat and the foods I liked most were very calorie dense. Second, I didn't know it at the time, but the manner in which I'd lost the weight, even though it was slow and gradual, 6-8 lbs per month, damaged my metabolism. When I lost the weight, I didn't pay any attention to maintaining muscle mass - the main engine that burns calories. I didn't do any weight training and I didn't pay any attention to the amount of protein in my diet. The result was that even on 2000 calories a day, I was still regaining weight.
Over the course of the next ten years, the damaged metabolism meant that I would gain weight unless I stayed on a permanently draconian diet. I couldn't do it - life got busy. I travelled a lot. At least I stayed off the cigarettes and kicked the cafeine habit as well (decafe coffee only, no caffeinated soda). But I slowly regained weight - at first 3-4 lobs a year; then 4-5, then 5-6 lbs. It was slow but it was steady and inexorable. Over that ten year period, I had gained 50 of those lbs back. I was at 215 lbs.. I was very unhappy and demoralized and my wife, who always ate healthy and exercised, was still her wonderful slim self. She tried to be diplomatic about it, but there was no denying that I was not attractive to her in that state.
Before embarking on another long term diet, I did some reading about metabolism - what increases it; what decreases it. I didn't want to lose all that weight again, just to be left in the same situation of having a metabolism that was just too low to maintain my desired weight. I learned a lot about weight training, protein levels, food combinations, the effect of insulin production on weight gain and loss and protein timing. After a couple of months of study, I felt I understood what had happened before and was ready to try again.
I put myself back on a 1500 calorie per day diet, but this time with at least 500 of those calories coming from protein; I ate protein with small amounts of healthy types of fat when eating carbs, avoided high glycemic index sugars and starches and, perhaps most importantly, did weight training with a good personal trainer three times per week along with cardio on gym machines 3-4 times per week.
The rate of weight loss was about the same, but I noticed that I wasn't as hungry and I wasn't getting that shrunken, emaciated look that occurred last time. My muscle tone was better and, based upon measured body fat, I was actually gaining a small amount of muscle mass instead of losing it. I lost 45 lbs in 7 months.
The difference was amazing. When I had previously lost the weight, I had gotten much smaller but my basic shape hadn't changed - I was still rounded in the shoulders and chest, middle and hips. I was just a smaller version of me. This time, my body's basic shape had changed. My shoulders and chest were larger and more angular, my waist slimmer with abs visible and hips and butt more muscular.
I was at a solid 170 lbs. and had learned some important lessons about weight loss. Now the test was whether the greater muscle mass and higher metabolism would allow me to keep it off. For almost 7 years it did. As long as I did the weight training (twice per week), did cardio 3-4 times a week, and ate healthy with lots of protein, I was, for the first time in my life, resistent to weight gain. I could go on vacation, binge a little and still not gain weight. This was very cool.
About three years ago, my long time trainer moved away. Even after 6 years of weight training, I never grew to like it. I could do it if I had an appointment with my trainer and she pushed me (yup, a female trainer - maybe that was part of the reason for the success). But on my own, I just couldn't stick with it. I never did find another trainer suitable for me - most were too young and temporary.
My life got very busy again - stress levels went up. My travel schedule got ridiculous and slowly but surely, the things that allowed me to maintain that weight started to fall away. No trainer so no weight training. Lots of work and travel, little time for cardio workouts. Food on the run - lots of eating out, more and more bad food choices. In a year and a half, I gained about five pounds. Doesn't sound like much, but after 6 years of never varying more than a pound or so, it was a lot and it was a harbinger of more to come. I steadied out for a few months at about 175 lbs., but about a year ago, when stress levels went up and all good food choices started to disappear, the weight gain started again. In a year's time, I put on 9 lbs. and there was no end in sight.
I tried to put a stop to it. Starting diets several times. But my old discipline failed me. There was always an excuse - too busy, need to be at my best, will start tomorrow, will workout twice as long tomorrow. On and on - I was surprised, disappointed in myself and scared that I would become that 235 lb. whale again - there didn't seem to be anything standing in the way.
I knew what the right things to do were - I knew what foods to eat, how much and when. I knew how much exercise I had to do and what type. I simply lacked the discipline, really the motivation to follow it. Then I hit upon the idea of The Chastity Diet. What stronger motivation for me was there then sex? None, absolutely none. Suppose after three days of dieting and sexual abstinence, my sexual release was dependent upon not eating that bowl of Chex mix with my evening glass of wine? Would I pass it up? Would I choose the opportunity for sexual release? Suppose I had lots of work related tasks to do but I needed to go to the gym to burn off 500 calories today which would allow me to lose that last two tenths of a pound to meet my one pound loss requirement for sex - would I do it? Would I find the time to go workout? After 19 days, I have found that the answer is a resounding YES! It really does work to counter-balance the immediate attraction and satisfaction of food or the avoidance of immediate discomfort from exercising.
Every time I've had one of those decisions to make in these last 19 days, the decision was the right one in terms of weight loss and advancing me towards an opportunity for sexual release. Ultimately, every diet consists of choices - being confronted with dozens of choices every day - what do I eat? How much? When? Do I exercise? When? How much? Every decision is like a scale or a balance - on one side is the attraction of food, the immediate comfort and satisfaction it brings; or the avoidance of discomfort from exercising. On the other side is the motivation for the diet - health, appearance, even sexual attractiveness. The food or non-exercise choice often wins, often outweighs the motivation because it is more immediate, more acutely felt; the motivation for losing the weight more long term.
By introducing sexual release as a motivation, I have effectly biased the scale in favor of making the correct weight loss decisions. For me, there is nothing except air and water that is more acute, urgent and immediate than the need for sexual release. And going without it, and knowing that I will continue to go without unless I meet my short term goal of losing a pound, makes it even more acute, urgent and immediate.
In future posts, I will talk about the effect of abstinence or chastity on sex when it actually finally occurs and what my wife thinks about it all - at least the part she knows about. And, I will talk about my struggles with the abstinence part of this program. The chastity part of this is totally new for me. I have been reading other blogs and picking up some good tips. I am always looking for more. Til next time.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

The CB-6000 Chastity Device

The CB-6000 is a fascinating device. As one of those old enough to remember Erector Sets, my first impression upon receiving it was this is the Anti-Erector Set. And, as it proved out from my testing, this initial impression was correct. The assembled device is pictured to the right under the title of the blog. It comes in a number of pieces, more than actually necessary for the assembled device because it gives sizing options (indeed, not all men are created equal). The clear material is polycarbonate and is a thick, stiff plastic. Basically, it comes with five different sized rings (actually, the rings only go about three quarter of the way around and is completed by two sections of plastic that complete it - the alignment pegs section and the overlay section. There are four different sized locking pins, each with its own sized plastic spacer that slips over it to maintain a certain distance between the ring enclosing the entire genitals and the tube or cage enclosing the shaft. For the rings, the sizing issue is how big you are around the entire genitals (cock and balls) and how tight you want it or can stand it. The length of locking pin and associated spacer determines how much room there is for the scrotum and balls that are held tightly between the ring and the cage.
The sequence needed to put this thing on is counter-intuitive. It would seem you start assembling the rings with the alignment posts and locking pin first and then slip the cage over the shaft. Well, I tried that - not a chance. Like cock rings have done for time immemorial, they immediately trap or slow the flow of blood out of the penis providing an instant erection. That's exactly what happened. I went from about three inches flaccid to six and half inches rock hard before I completed assembling the ring. No way the engorged head would fit in an opening that is about one and quarter inches high and one and three eighth inches wide (the cage is slightly oval, not round). Okay, back up - disassemble the ring, apply ice, watch a little football and try to get back to flaccid.
Fifteen minutes later, I check out the equipment and back to its usual, unexited dangle. This time, I apply a little water based lube to the shaft and head and try to fit the tube onto it. It doesn't just slide on, still too large but now that it's soft squishy I can press and push it. Using fingertips and a little downward pressure on the tube, I get it on, but doing so excites me some and I start to erect again. Not as much as with the ring but I go from three to four plus inches pretty quickly. Jamming the head all the way, working through the slightly narrowed end of the cage where the pronounced head enclosure starts, I find that I'm still hanging out a little when I start to assemble the ring.

Monday, January 4, 2010

The Chastity Diet

First the facts: I'm an ordinary guy in my mid 50's that enjoys all kinds of Kink, BD, Femdom, etc., at least in fantasy. I'm a closet submissive with an active fantasy life. I have also put on a few extra pounds in the past year that, up to now, I have been unable to take off. I have been happily married for nearly twenty years to a beautiful wife who is in her early 50's and still has the same slim figure she had when I married her. I also have a strong sex drive - not quite insatiable but pretty close. In fact, until recently, unless I was sick, I mean really under the weather, I have probably masturbated to orgasm at least once a day for my entire adult life, even when I was getting sex regularly from girlfriends and then my wife. My wife's sex drive has waned over the years - particularly in the last few years as she's gone through menopause. If it was entirely up to me, I would have sex with my wife everyday. If my wife was deciding on frequency of relations purely on her own sexual desires, then once every two or three weeks would be fine with her and it would be no big deal to entend that out. We have pretty much compromised to once or twice a week, sometimes less when she's not feeling well or has one of her frequent bladder infections.
The Solution: Given these facts, why not live out one of my fantasies, that of enforced chastity, while losing weight in the bargain. Problem - my wife is totally vanilla in her sexual interests. Previous attempts to interest her in even light bondage or domination has met with absolute refusal if she was to be the bottom and a kind of bemused indifference (like "whatever") when I offered to bottom. Solution - I proposed to her that I use desire for sex as an incentive to lose weight. I did this without using the "Chastity" word, a word that would surely put her off. I offered to deny myself sexual release (she understands this as no sex with her; but my real intention is no sexual release at all - i.e. no masturbation) unless I lose a pound, and then if I achieve that, go into orgasm denial until I lose another pound, etc. until I lose 15 lbs. Well, she loved the idea. She's wanted me to lose weight (she's very big on healthy eating and weight control and, she'd prefer to have sex less often, a lot less often. Voila - a perfect match.
Besides not using the word "Chastity" with my wife, I also left out the small detail that I would be using a device, a chastity device to control or deny myself the ability to give myself sexual release. Hence the name of this blog: Secret Chastity Husband. Now this is going to be interesting! How do I hide it and when and how do I tell her (or do I).
First things first, I researched chastity devices and decided the CB-6000 looked like the best bet (I'll be uploading a picture when I get a chance). It was done by process of elimination. Chastity belts were out of the question - no way to hide that and most were too expensive. Prior models were the CB-2000 and CB-3000, but I figured there was a reason they went to a new model - apparently, the hinge type ring was irritating. I received the CB-6000 three weeks ago and tested it out. I'll describe my first impressions in my next post. I started the diet twelve days ago and I've lost 3 lbs in that time - not bad considering the period covered the Christmas Holiday and New Year's Eve. I'll write more about the diet and the effect of orgasm denial on will power in future posts. Until then - long live polycarbonate material and fresh fruits and veggies.

Sunday, January 3, 2010

This is my first post to test the new blog

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